Séxual chemistry.
Jessica Ciencin Henriquez, who kept her "purity" until her wedding night, writes in Salon:
Our bodies wanted different things from one another, so what we ended up with was a horizontal battle. I would hear married girlfriends talk about the joys of make-up s*x and continue to sip my coffee in silence. We would fight, and then have bad s*x and then fight some more. Every flaw in our marriage and in him seemed much more miserable when combined with the possibility of faking orgasms until death did we part. There was no relief. Six months into our marriage, the idea of
separating seemed more appealing than feigning headaches for the rest of my life.
As Jessica found out, s*xual chemistry is something that can really only be ascertained by, well, having s*x. Jessica would make out for hours with her husband before their marriage, so she thought that would translate into awesome horizontal mambo. But it didn't.
Séxual identity.
I know too many couples where one partner was able to cover up his or her true s*xual persuasion because he or she simply didn't have s*x with anyone. Not having s*x with the opposite s*x can also mean you ignore those longings you might have for the same s*x, and therefore don't acknowledge them.
Séx itself.
Not everyone is great in bed, and most people don't start out very good at all. A lot of good s*x is about listening to your partner and being able to respond accordingly. But how do you know if someone is a good listener or responder unless you try it first?
Size.
Don't you want to know if your husband is packing a hunting rifle or a tiny little plastic kid's pistol? After all, he knows how big your b**bs are. I'm not saying size would be a dealbreaker, but don't you have the right to know what's down there?
Séxual issues.
s*xual problems like premature ejaculation, inability to get an erection, or even an allergy to your partner's semen are all possibilities, wouldn't you rather deal with those issues before you're married? This way you know if your future is even going to address them.
Let's face it, s*x plays a big role in marriage. Just like you should discuss children, religion, and where you both want to live before tying the knot, s*x is too big a part of a relationship to leave to chance.
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